“You’re gonna cry when we leave.”
“Yeah. Tears of joy because the reign of terror is ending.”
“Whatever old woman. You’ll see. We’ll be driving away and you’ll be crying.”
“Don’t hold your breath bucko.”
I mean really. Why would I cry? I will finally have a clean car that isn’t filled with maniacs and Disney movies.
I can finally get to the fireplace without having to swim through sticky faced gremlins.
I won't have baby chicks in the shower.
I won't have trouble figuring out which one is the monkey any more.
I can go outside without getting buzzed by this.
I can camp in peace and quiet without hordes of goonies.
And finally, I can sit at my table and drink my tea alone. With nobody to talk to. Without this one having deep, intellectual discussions with me. Or praying with me. Or telling me how much I am loved.
Yep, it will be great and I won't shed a tear. Not one single tear. I will be smiling because they are finally gone and I can sit back and relax without having to plan anymore dinner parties or get-togethers or cheese and whine girls nights. Not one tear.
I'm going to chop more onions now. The end.