Tuesday, April 13, 2010

With Apologies To The Animals

Sung to the tune of House of the Rising Sun
(work with me, people!)

There is a henhouse in Piedmont
They call the Rising Sun
And it's been the ruin of many a poor rooster
And God I know I'm one




My mother was a chicken
She layed a thousand eggs
My father was a ramblin' rooster
With Orange and Yellow legs



Now the only thing a rooster needs
Is some grain and an enemy
And the only time he's satisfied
Is when that enemy is me



------ organ solo ------
(use your imagination....sheesh!)


Oh mother tell your chickens
Not to do what I have done
Spend their lives in sin and misery
In the HenHouse of the Rising Sun



Well, she's got one hand on the henhouse
The other hand on the ax
I'm goin' back to the kitchen
To be fried to the max



Well, there is a henhouse in Piedmont
They call the Rising Sun
And it's been the ruin of many a poor rooster
And God I know I'm one



Ok, so this is ridiculous. I had to vent. That blankety blank rooster attacked me....again! My leg is bruised and my hand was actually bleeding. Cannibal! No, I didn't really chop his head off and fry him....




.....yet.

We got chickens to have fresh eggs for our family and to share with those in need. Why we agreed to take the rooster I will never know. He is so gonna get it one of these days.




And yes.....I scream like a girl. But I kick like a mule. Just ask the rooster.



16 comments:

Ms. Anthropy said...

When I was just a wee little tyke, my grandparents rooster flogged me, spurred me, or whatever you call it. Can you say chicken and dumplins. They sure were yummy! Bad rooster!

Brian Miller said...

hahaha. especially if he cant tell time and crows in the middle of the night...fry him up!

Kfred said...

I cannot even begin to compete with this one! Excellent!

honeypiehorse said...

Brilliant!

Parsley said...

Not laughing at your injury but BWAHH HA HA HA HA. My mom had a rooster that kept attacking her. She grabbed him and cut off his tallons. Bled she told me but he left her alone after that.

Oklahoma Granny said...

Oh, my goodness. You are SO funny girlie!

TechnoBabe said...

Dang rooster!!! Sorry for the bodily harm you endure to house the big guy.

Auntie Cake said...

And he is such a sweet looking rooster. I realized the other day that now I have three roosters. I know about the one, suspected the other, but the third was a complete surprise! I guess I need to pay attention to what is actually going on in the chicken coop. It's fun watching the hierarchy though! The biggest one is a particularly randy guy and the other two get after him when he goes after the ladies!

And have you tried carrying a metal garbage can lid? A former rooster always went after my son, he started carrying a lid as a shield. It was hilarious watching him and the rooster, but it did work!

Hoping you get a ton of eggs today!
Kate

Coby said...

Thanks for the laughs! So sorry about your injury! Fry that thing up and serve him with a side of mashed potatoes, green beans, and cornbread!!!

Lola Sharp said...

Oh man, a rooster aint got nothin' on a goose! Geese can be evil.

Sorry about the rooster. He deserved a good punt.

Coby made me hungry...

Perfect song for this. :o) Great post!

Nancy C said...

You are brilliant. That's all I've got to say.

Monkey Man said...

funny. brings back memories of bringing chickens to my mom and dad for slaughter when I was three.

Two Shades of Pink said...

I don't know nothin' bout no attack roosters. But this sure made me laugh!

Blasé said...

Cock-a-doodle-don't

Sarah said...

lol! I've seen chickens' necks being chopped off before they die before. it's not a pretty picture. you might want to tell that to the rooster.

Lily Robinson said...

Dirty, nasty birds! Mr J loves the sound of the roosters. It's nice, but I could live without the chickens. But what would I do with all the spare time if I didn't have eggs to wash?