Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Free Marriage Advice ~ Worth Every Penny

I love encouraging words. I find them everywhere: In fortune cookies, driving along the highway on billboards, in books, magazines, conversations and famous quotes. All you have to do is listen to each day with an open heart and you’ll hear that still small voice speaking to you through the most unexpected avenues. Take tonight for example.

I had a wonderfully witty post all ready to go, then Bob came home from work. From the moment the love of my life walked through the door, I had this unexplainable urge to smother him with a pillow. Don’t get me wrong, I truly love the guy. If you have followed this blog for more than a minute, you can attest to my seriously high mush level for the man. But sometimes, well sometimes, I just want to off him.

I am sure it is because there is something seriously psychologically wrong with me. There is no way it would have anything to do with the constant shadow behind me, picking lint off my clothes, asking me if I feel ok, chattering on and on about car engines and automotive oil and prostates or some such things. I am absolutely positive it has everything to do with me constantly moving the emotional lines in the relationship and being moody and not being able to ever take a joke. Yeah, that is definitely it. Not the lint picking.

Anyway, after an absolutely delightful evening together, I decided to place my previously prepared post on hold and instead look for wonderful, happy, completely uplifting and true quotes on marriage. After all, with the 34 years we have invested in this gig, it is our duty at the least to encourage the younger generations that marriage is sacred, holy and not to be taken lightly. So without further ado, please feel free to print this amazing post out, have it enlarged and framed and mounted prominently on your living room wall because, yeah, it’s that valuable.

“All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.” -Raymond Hull

My advice would be to skip purchasing a house and go for the condo option. They can even be next to each other. Let me know if you’d like my agent to contact you when she finishes my deal. You’re welcome.

"Marriage is an adventure, like going to war." -G. K. Chesterton

Adventure is good. Look what it did for Alice in Wonderland.

"It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” -Rita Rudner

Of course, finding that one special person is only a small part of the equation. Practicing and then perfecting the art of annoying, now that, my friends, takes time and planning.

"The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him." -Oscar Wilde

Well said, Oscar. Well said.

When Ruth Graham, wife of Billy Graham, was once asked if she ever thought about divorce she said, “No, I've never thought of divorce in all these 35 years of marriage but I did think of murder a few times.”

God Bless Ruth Graham. A woman after my own heart.

That is all.


J.J. in L.A. said...

Funny you should post this now, I just wrote one about my 1st date with my man. I'll print this and hang it on the wall if it ever comes to that.

I like Oscar's take on marriage the most. ; )

Glen said...

Marriage - turns men into boys and women into WIVES (shudder) the word "wives" sounds scarily similar to Gruffalo if you say it fast enough... or is that just in my house?

Brian Miller said... it...the quotes and your is an adventure, and a tragedy, and a comedy, and...

Two Shades of Pink said...

Yep. That about sums it up. When my husband started whistling through his nose for an hour in the wee hours of the morning the other night...the term "off him" came to mind as well. It's still the little things that romance us but the little things can also entice us to commit a felony.

Matty said...

No matter how loving and solid a relationship, there are still those special "moments". Ruth Graham said it best. LMAO

aLmYbNeNr said...

HAHA I love it! Especially the Oscar Wilde one and the Ruth Graham one.

Teresa - in the Middle Side of Life said...

great post. i've been in that boat more than once here lately. my son mentioned to me today that i've been "angry" this past week. hmmm... yep - i have been, but only when i'm awake. and since i am sleep deprived at the moment i concede. i think it's because i don't feel well this week. but "off him" is a great term.

i said i wanted a divorce from my life or i wanted my old husband back. {sigh} doesn't look like either of those will happen. LOL!

love the quotes.

Bob said...

You should have gone with your wonderfully witty post.

Formerly known as Frau said...

Love them all! Smother with a pillow...know that feeling!

Mrs4444 said...

haha, Bob! Nice comment. :)

Mrs4444 said...

haha, Bob! Nice comment. :)

Emily said...

Great quotes! Thanks for putting a small on my face.

dbs said...

I bet your pillow murder urge is motivated by the same thing that motivates my wife: I did something stupid again.
It could also be caused by the weird thing women have about pillows:

Dawn said...

I love Oscar and Ruth. Those are some mighty find words of wisdom. LOL!

Kristen said...

SO TRUE!!! You know we are a lot alike in the hubby love department, and now you have proved it OH SO MUCH MORE. I am SERIOUSLY into the side by side condo idea - We would be so much better for it!! This could really be a new adventure.... It would be a side by side condo with an adjoining MASTER bedroom at the top and the bethrooms in each own's condo.... I LOVE IT!! (an adjoining kitchen and dining room would be fine too....)