Friday, March 25, 2011

Time Waits For No Blogger

One of the really tough things about having a blog is that I am constantly writing posts in my head. I write them in bed late at night while Bob snores like a freight train next to me. I write them driving to work, on my lunch break, at the bank, in the bathroom and while counting down the drawer at the end of the day. I also write them in the middle of family conversations, while taking my shower, visiting the dentist or just about any and every other scenario you might imagine. It’s maddening but I have not a clue on how to stop. The truth is, I have always written in my head like this, since I was a kid. The only difference now is that I post many of these musings on the Internet for all the world to see. I wonder what Freud would say about that? Probably not much since the guy is dead. Just pointing out the obvious, folks.





The other tough part about being a mental writer is …wait, that doesn’t sound right. Anyway, the thing that drives me madder than I already am is that I have some pretty interesting things going on in my life and in my head. Stuff some people might actually want to read if only to say, “Can you believe the crap this chick writes? Unbelievable!” There is where the difficulty begins and ends. Actually living this insanity on a daily basis, writing it down in my brain and then not being able to find the time or energy to actually write it down. I am honestly not whining about not having time to write. I honestly don’t have time to write lately. It’s starting to annoy me because of all the stories being written in my brain. It’s seriously getting crowded in there.



Anyway, I have been thinking of ways to find more time to write.



1. Hire a servant. He must cook, clean, do farm chores and laundry. Grocery shopping is expected. He would also have to do all the extras like remember birthdays and throw elaborate dinners because that would also be expected. It would be crucial that he be ready, willing and able to jump in the car and take the soon to be 13 year old and her friends on their constant excursions. And listen to their ear-splitting laughter while driving without driving off the road or into a brick wall. Although he may consider both options just to shut them up, he would not be allowed to exercise either option. He would also have to keep a smile on his face at all times while making sure everyone in the house is clean, fed and happy. I would want him to be sort of like a wife, that way I wouldn’t have to pay him either.



2. Clean out our bank account and run away to Europe where I can sit at a little sidewalk café, eating hunks of cheese and bread while writing the memoir of my life. This might not be a viable option however as I believe a ticket to Europe might possibly cost more than $83.47, so scratch that.



3. Get up two hours earlier every morning so I can be alone with my thoughts and write. The only problem I can see with this option is the getting up at 5 am part. I sincerely doubt my brain would be awake. Although, now that I think about it, my writing might be a whole lot better if I wasn’t actually there when it happened. This could work.

12 comments:

The Duck Herder said...

hmmm, hello dear avalanche of love.

Thank you for avalanching all over my blog the other day - it was like royalty had visited and wiped its royal feet all over the place - lovely.


This is a problem - how to find time to write about your crazy life when you life is too crazy to write in......


If you chose option 2, but substitute Europe somewhere for Our Nation's Capital in Oooorstraaayleeya (a mere 25km from Jerrabomberra), you would be welcome to hang out in our spare room, use our broadband connection etc. I can promise lots of quiet space interspersed with raucus laughter, endless pots of tea and good but infrequent meals.......and at least one cat to cuddle up to at night.

Perhaps that nice boy could drop you off in that helicopter thing of his. Are there rules about that?

Hang in there crazy one.

xxxxx

Ms. A said...

A "HE" servant. Now that's thinking. If you can find and "HE" that is capable of doing all the things you do... HIRE HIM! He's worth every penny. (and who knows, maybe there would be some perks)

Matty said...

Yikes. Someone else does this. I write posts in my head too. And just like you, I have a go-zillion ideas that I never get around to writing. Now if I could only get someone to do everything else for me, I could sit down and unload my mind of all these great blog posts.

J.J. in L.A. said...

What Ms. A said about the servant being a 'he'. That could be fun!

I take my cell phone to bed with me because my best ideas come while my brain is trying to shut down. I write them down on the notepad so I can finally get to sleep.

Elisabeth said...

It's a pity isn't it that our mental writing does not find its way onto paper, what wonderful manuscripts we'd produce? Thanks though for this real blog, beyond your mind.

TechnoBabe said...

So you are choosing door number three. Well, we shall be the judge as to how well you write with your brain still sawing zzzz.

Teresa - in the Middle Side of Life said...

just another confirmation that we are truly kindred spirits who just haven't met yet! i do the same thing and then i sit down and my mind goes "what were you saying???" i've started jotting things down in a little notebook (one of those that i made) so when i have an aha moment, i can capture it before it gets away.

i have so much to say and so little time to say it! i know that there's good stuff in there just waiting to get out.

Kelley Simpson said...

Thank you so much for putting words to the torment I feel in my head all day everyday and during every shower and car drive (transporting the 15 and 7 year olds...) I love your writing and will wait till you have the time to make more of it.

All the best, Kelley

Brian Miller said...

i am liking the europe option...still have not figured out how to pull it off but....

gayle said...

Me too but then I forget them!

Not So Simply Single said...

Once you get that servant, will you share him with me?

Thanks!

Lisa

rv backup camera said...

Now this is just silly. Why would you hire a servant? Isn't that what children are for? I don't have any yet, but I know my main reason for going through the excruciating process of childbirth is to have free labor!