The Madness Continues

I have been working frantically to finish answering your questions and dares when who should pop up at the last minute but Kfred. If you have never met him, beware. He blogs over at Flatline Thinking which I believe has something to do with lobotomized convicts or some such thing. I still haven't quite figured it all out. Anyway, he left this comment:


With no disrespect intended to your other readers, I note that a number of the actual questions posted earlier are a bit "lightweight". I actually devised some dares, but, after a cursory review of Oklahoma state law, discovered 2 were outlawed, 1 was classified as a misdemeanor, and the other would subject you to being cast to Hell.


Therefore, I dare you to answer these 2 questions:


1) Have you EVER run with scissors?


2) Have you ever attempted to swim sooner than one hour after eating?


My dear Kfred, first I would like to address your concerns about Oklahoma law breaking here at Hansen Farm. We laugh in the face of misdemeanors. Just ask my son, I won't name which one, or what actual misdemeanors were laughed at. That would just be wrong to point the finger at our youngest boy. I mean, what would his new wife say if we were to blog for all the world to see that he had a laughing problem when it came to Oklahoma laws regarding misdemeanors? I mean, seriously, what kind of a mother would I be to do such a thing? As for the two possible dares that were outlawed: How do you think they became outlawed? Again, I am not saying anything directly about anyone in this family although I am very happy "someone" hightailed it out of the state and is now holed up somewhere in California. Isn't that where you live, Kfred? You might want to ask any Hansens you come across if they are the youngest son of anyone in Oklahoma. Protect yourself. That's all I'm saying. The being cast to Hell dare? How do you think I ended up in Oklahoma?


1) Have you EVER run with scissors?

I may have once or twice. It's hard to remember since having those scissors removed from my head.

2) Have you ever attempted to swim sooner than one hour after eating?

No, never. Bob always takes my measurements before I swim, making sure I have completely digested all food and it has been properly applied to my thighs before diving in.